KP and I are finally over. It’s my fault for dragging it out for 3 months.
KP failed to say happy birthday on my birthday a month ago. To me, that was a huge red flag. I tried to blow it off, telling myself it wasn’t a big deal. But it was. I finally brought it up when we went out last night. I told him it made me feel like he didn’t like me and it hurt my feelings. He apologized and gave me some bulls**t answer. I wasn’t satisfied with what he told me, so I asked him again around 4 am. He finally confessed that he didn’t want to mislead me and he wasn’t looking for anything serious. He said he had already done the serious thing and never wanted a serious relationship again. That he had issues and that the therapy was never going to change that. I told him that we were obviously in different places and that I couldn’t see him anymore. I wanted a serious relationship and eventually marriage…with someone. I was strong enough to say it but not strong enough not to shed a few tears.
Why can’t we all have a crystal ball to let us know that there will be someone else? Someone else better. Something to help make all these decisions a little easier. I am not confident that there will ever be another guy. I’ve been saying that since high school. I knew he didn’t want anything serious, so I am suprised that I got upset. I guess I thought if I hung around him long enough he would change his mind. About me, about wanting something serious. How did I trick myself into believing a lie? I can’t help but think when guys say they aren’t looking for something serious, it translates into “I don’t want to be serious with you.” So for now, it’s okay for me to take a break. It’s okay for me to hold on to his t-shirt. It’s okay for me to be sad for one day.
well good, i’m glad you told him you couldn’t see him anymore! i mean, it’s a good thing, cuz you wouldn’t want to be eating at the CF for the rest of your life anyway, right?
seriously though, you did the right thing and there definitely IS someone else out there. i have a hard time believing that myself sometimes, but it’s actually true.
Girl…..I’m sorry to hear that things ended. As much as it sucks, I agree with Posh, that you did the right thing. It’s strong, mature and solid. I know it hurts and sucks, but you know what you want and stand for it. I know way too many woman, who would start bending over backwards to what they really want, just to try to keep a guy (the operative word being ‘try’ b/c many will attempt, and if the guy isn’t playing, he’s not going to ever change.)
Hang in….you are completely entitled to be sad…for a day…a week, maybe even a month.
Yes, as everyone else has said, you totally did the right thing. I know it SUCKS and it probably feels kinda hopeless right now, but you SO did the right thing! You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you…we all do. And you will find that someone…we all will! Meanwhile, feel free to be sad and upset about this. Not to sound clichéd, but I think it’s these hard times that make us stronger and teach us more about what we do and don’t want in dating and relationships.
We’re rooting for you, Apricot!
Awww…Unfortunately, there is no crystal ball to forecast the dating horizon. It is sad, but as the previous comments reflect, you are not alone. Almost everyone goes through the same ups and downs of relationships. In my opinion, you definitely did the right thing. Why waste time and attention on someone that isn’t at the same point in their life nor shares your common goals? It is heartbreaking, but it is strength of character to be able to recognize it and walk away.
You are stronger because of this. You are beautiful and worthy of love despite the fact that this man could not recognize it. It is definitely his loss and there are many others out there that WILL recognize the gifts that you possess. Then, the ball will be in your court to decide if those others are worthy of you.
Regardless, being single and without a significant other is not a crime nor punishment. You should enjoy it and concentrate on loving yourself and continuing to have fun. When you do, if you find someone it makes life even more enjoyable.