Date & Dish

This post is part-dish, part-diss.

I’ll start with the diss. You may recall that the last time I saw HH he invited me to a photography exhibit later in the week. I thought that was very cool and was looking forward to going. I sent him an e-mail the day after our date to let him know that I could indeed make it, and to ask him for whatever details I needed to know. A day or two later, I sent him an e-mail inviting him to something that was going on the day after the photography exhibit, thinking I would reciprocate his friendly invite.

Well, the day before the photography exhibit came, and I hadn’t heard anything at all from him. Nada. Zilch. No response to either of my two e-mails, no phone call, nothing. So I sent him a text asking if he was still planning to go the next evening. His response was so incredibly nonchalant, it irked me.

Still going. U should stop by. [address here] Can’t make Thursday night.

Now, is it just me, or does that reek of something that’s not good? Either he’s losing interest in me, or he’s playing it so cool that he’s pretending he’s losing interest in me. Either way, I don’t like it. He obviously had read my e-mails since he said he couldn’t make Thursday night. Why didn’t he just click “reply” and send me a note to let me know? Why did he wait until I sent him the text message to communicate with me?

I didn’t even know how to respond to his text, so I didn’t. On the day of the exhibit, I just decided not to go. I didn’t want to get caught in another round of “does he or doesn’t he?” like I did with CB, so I figured if HH wants to see me again, he’ll make it happen. I did send HH a text that evening that said I got caught up in some work stuff (which was true…I was working on some stuff) and I hope he was having a nice evening. The next day, I got an e-mail from him saying he was sorry I didn’t make it, sharing some info on the photographer, and saying that he hoped I was having a great week.

If there were awards for sending mixed messages, or saying nothing while saying something, I think he would win. But he hasn’t tried to kiss me yet, so maybe he really isn’t into me after all. Who knows?

I replied to his e-mail in the same nothing manner, saying my week was crazy, explaining what I was up to when I missed the exhibit, and telling him to have a great week — and I haven’t heard from him since.

Of course, I think he’s weird. Either he likes me and is totally afraid of me, or he doesn’t like me but doesn’t want to get rid of me. I do wonder, though, if he sits around with his friends talking about “this weird girl Friday” — wouldn’t that be something?

So the week was fairly quiet. Phone Man called me a few times. I think I’ll go out with him again to see if it goes anywhere. I know, I probably shouldn’t, especially if I’m not sure, but he really is so nice that I think *maybe* I could like him.

That doesn’t sound very promising, does it?

He wanted to go see a movie this weekend, but I was booked. I’m busy this week and out of town for the weekend, so it may be a while before I see Phone Man again anyway.

I hadn’t heard from Canada Guy in a while…the guy I went to lunch with once but haven’t seen again since then. He was traveling but he said he’d be back in town about 10 days ago, and he’d be in touch so we could get together again. We even exchanged a few e-mails while he was gone, and he said he picked up something cute for me in Asia. Well, his return home came and went, and I didn’t hear anything from him. I figured he must be getting settled back in and didn’t bug him. I saw that he was in fact logging into the dating site, but I still figured I’d give him another few days before sending him a note. Well, I finally broke down and sent him a brief note that said, hey, Canada Guy, haven’t heard from you in a while, how are things? He wrote me back the next day and said he had still been traveling a ton, and he got me something really cute in Asia, and I had to go to lunch with him to get it. So I guess we’ll make plans for lunch sometime.

My one date for the week was last night, with a guy I didn’t meet online. We met at an evening class at a local university. I’ll call him Class Guy. We chatted a few times over the course of the four weeks we were in class, mostly while we walked to and from the parking deck. I sensed some attraction there, so I wasn’t totally surprised that he asked me out, although it was a bit of a shock to be asked out in person rather than online!

We chatted a few times over the course of last week to make plans. He made reservations at a really nice restaurant that I’ve been wanting to try for a while. We met there since it was most convenient based on where I was earlier in the day. We started at the bar, and he laughed at me when I offered to help pay for my wine. He said, “What kind of first dates have you been on?”, referring to the fact that I’ve been going on a lot of first dates with the whole online dating thing. He asked if anyone ever said yes and let me help pay, and I told him that sometimes yes, they do. He laughed and said he was old-fashioned and thought the man should always pay.

I used to be a bit of a feminazi about this subject, and I always thought I should be allowed to help pay at least some of the time. But something about Class Guy made me think, you know, if he wants to pay, how nice of him! I’ll just enjoy it!

We had a great time at dinner. We ordered lots of food — two appetizers, two entrées, a bottle of wine, and four — yes FOUR — desserts. After dinner, we were having such a nice time that we walked across the parking lot to the restaurant’s sister tapas and wine bar. We stayed there for a few hours, chatting and laughing and doing that weird thing when you know you’re going to kiss each other but you know it’s not going to happen at that moment.

Before we went our separate ways, he commented on the dilemma he had that both of our cars were there, and he wasn’t able to walk me to my car or to my door. I played dumb and asked, “What for?” Then I told him he was a smart guy and I’m sure he could figure something out.

Well, when the valet brought my car, Class Guy had the confidence to move in for a goodnight kiss, right in front of the valet stand and a bunch of strangers. Go, Class Guy! I thought it was pretty cool. I had a great time with him, and I’m sure I’ll see him again.

What’s interesting is that there is a 14-year age difference between HH and Class Guy. Crazy, huh? HH is five years younger than me, and Class Guy is a little over eight years older than me. I can see what a difference time can make. After my last relationship, I found myself more attracted to younger guys and kind of unopen to dating older guys.

But I think Class Guy might make me rethink that approach.

[UPDATE: Class Guy actually just called. We’re going to get together after work one night this week. What’s weird is that he asked if anything was wrong. I tried to tell him no, but he sensed that something was off. I guess he probably picked up on my being caught off-guard that I was blogging about him when he called, as well as my overall state of mind right now about everything in general. My last ex and I are trying to remain friends, and we had a bit of a spat today. I think it’s kinda weird that Class Guy was able to pick up on something being a little off about me from our 10-minute phone conversation….]